I'm a little confused, and not in the good, college freshman girl meets the older more experienced lesbian roommate kind of confused. Specifically, I'm confused about Jim Edmonds. Edmonds hit another homerun last night, a two run shot that gave the Cubs the lead for a time. Edmonds has now hit 9 homeruns, 8 with the Cubs and is batting a robust .292 since leaving the spacious eyesore that is PetCo Park. He is proving to be the left handed power bat Lou Pinella craved in spring training and throughout the month of April. Like many others, I derided this signing when it first took place. I totally believed Edmonds was done, nothing left in the tank. Christ, I was hoping he was done, just to avoid the quandary I now find myself in. This would be the uncomfortable position of rooting for Jim Edmonds and being happy when he does well. I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. I'm glad that he's helping the team, but at the same time, I've despised the guy for so long that it's been difficult for me to cheer when he comes to the plate or makes an awesome catch. Last night, I caught myself doing a fist pump as Edmond's homer sailed over the wall between the lame-ass cars and immediately felt dirty. I feel like I watched my freshman year roommate shower and discovered I had a boner, if that makes any sense to you. I just feel . . . disturbed. I mean I still don't feel the need to go out and buy a Jim Edmonds T-Shirt or jersey, but I feel the hatred slipping away.
Anyhoo, the other thing that worries me is Carlos Marmol. Marmol was filthy for the first two batters he faced last night before he reverted to the form he's shown over the past week or so. He walked a guy, gave up a hit, and then laid a fastball over the sweetspot of the plate, which Ray Durham proceeded to massacre, tying the game, and destroying the ERA of two of my flipping fantasy teams. The quick work he made of the first two batters gives me hope that he's figuring out his issues, but he still seems to have some control issues, as well as a tendency to give up the long ball. Hopefully, Larry and Geo can get his ass straightened out. I love the kid, but it's obvious that Lou made the right choice by making Kerry and his beard the closer.
Speaking of which, not even a triple by Jose Castillo could stop the Beard from notching his 21st save of the season. Where are all you punks calling for him to be replaced now? That's what I thought. The Beard and Rod Beck's Mustache threw down in the Lounge last night and there's broken Coors bottles and panties all over the fucking place. Sean Gallagher takes on Tiny Tim Lincecum tonight. Let's see who's taller, Mike Fontenot or Lincecum. We already know Fontenot's got the bigger stick. Mighty Mouse is clutch. See you all Monday after the Cardinals series!
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