55-37: Zambrano Sizzles, Lilly Fizzles Against Reds

On Wednesday, Carlos Zambrano held the Reds to 1 hit, a HR shot from the Big Donkey, Adam Dunn. Other than that, El Toro was dealing, a man possessed on the mound. Carlos really seems to be on a mission, taking this team on his big, brawny shoulders. The antics have been reduced, what's left is the solid starting pitcher, the team leader. The man. Carlos Marmol was a little shaky after getting the first two outs, but the Beard came in with the bases juiced and nailed it down on a foul out to DLee.

Thursday's outing from Ted Lilly took the opposite route as he was unable to escape the 3rd. The Cubs and Reds played slugfest all day, the Reds eventually triumphing 12-7. The Reds hit 7 homeruns in the ballgame, including a mammoth Dunn shot in the rain that probably still hasn't landed yet. It might have beat those fuckers back to Cincinnati for all I know. J.M. Riccardi, you sure you wouldn't want to have Adam Dunn? Yeah, he can't hit for average, but holy freaking crap can he hit that ball far. Guy's a DHing wet dream.

Still, we took the series from the Reds, always a good thing to send the Dustbag out of town the overall loser. The Giants come to town today for a weekend series. Hopefully, Matt Cain and Tim Lincecum won't be as sharp as they were in the Bay area and we can rattle off another series win.

Dick Hardon starts tomorrow for the Cubs and I'm pretty excited. Even if his arm does blow up, at least the womenfolk have a new stud in town to watch. That whooshing sound you heard was panties blowing off all across Chicago. Those eyes, that come hither crooked smile, that five o'clock shadow . . . wait, does that come off gay? Fuck, I don't care. Mark DeRosa better watch out, there's a new sweetie in town!